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The league of successful “Autodidacts”



Are you a Conformist or do you have the courage to change your world?


TED Talk http://youtu.be/a181ctQyGY4

http://youtu.be/a181ctQyGY4

 

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TED Talks


Living in a bitter world without clear conscience


I love those who can smile in trouble, who can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection. ‘Tis the business of little minds to shrink, but they whose heart is firm, and whose conscience approves their conduct, will pursue their principles unto death.
Leonardo da Vinci

The strange thing about us human beings is that we often spend a lot of time and energy searching for ideas, and answers which often are found within ourselves. Many blame the world and everything they can and some often find their answers within. One of the most important answer we often seem to seek is: if we are doing the right thing? Or is what we are doing good for us? And as many accomplished and successful people have pointed out based on their own experiences: “listen to your inner voice or gut feeling”. Somehow this inner voice seems to know all the right answers and helps guide you often to the right things in life. And when we do something wrong it begins to eat us up from inside with guilt. But this inner voice is only heard if one pays attention and takes the effort to query or listen to it. And it only works if you take the necessary positive actions to do the right thing. This magical phenomenon that all of us have been gifted with is almost like a divine compass called Conscience. Like all the greatest gifts that we have Conscience is also another intangible and immeasurable possession like love, feelings, thinking etc.

Conscience is often found as a feeling of remorse when a human being commits actions that go against his or her moral values and beliefs. Conscience is like an aptitude, intuition or judgment of our thoughts and behaviours that distinguishes right from wrong. And us humans are asked to invoke this conscience universally through all religious belief systems and by means of any basic intellectual norms.

The word “conscience” is derived from the Latin word conscientia, meaning “privity of knowledge” or “with-knowledge”. The English word implies internal awareness of a moral standard in the mind concerning the quality of one’s motives, as well as a consciousness of our own actions. Conscience may be defined as the practical reason employed when applying moral convictions to a situation The many philosophers, or saints often ask to invoke our conscience to develop it, as they themselves do through daily contemplation or meditation combined with selfless service to others. Such developed state of conscience helps create a strong sense of intuitive insight or revelation to many. This helps a person to use their intellect towards positive and humane causes, pursue further knowledge, be self critical with the focus of self improvement and on a general level apply fair justice in his or her life.

The human voice can never reach the distance that is covered by the still small voice of conscience.
Mohandas Gandhi

Yet we, the most developed and gifted species choose to live by killing our own conscience. Our pride, ego, anger and prejudice help us do things against our very own conscience until it is too late. The sad fact is that while one does things that go against their own moral values or beliefs, the conscience keep telling them that it is wrong. Once we do things against our conscience and fail, our conscience begins to hurt us with the feeling of severe guilt. But instead of taking the necessary positive steps to undo the damage many still continue to stifle this inner voice with rage and anger or drown it in intoxication. We the intelligent, civilized and knowledgeable species choose such.

All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent.
Thomas Jefferson

It is plain common sense that many of our personal and worlds’ ills are result of actions in rage and blind fury. The things we say to hurt others, the things we do to hurt others and ourselves, the greed we posses, the prejudice we hold, the disrespect we show are some of the things we do often against our conscience. The violent killings, the communal riots, steeling, damaging things, wars, or theft are all things that people do against their basic human moral values and beliefs. The greatest crimes against humanity are often over the deliberate killing of our own conscience. The person who commits the atrocity and the person who witnesses it and chooses to close their door on the facts and reality are both guilty of killing their own conscience.

Never do anything against conscience even if the state demands it.
Albert Einstein

But this gift of conscience is a wonderful thing. It is the conscience that makes the individual set out to accomplish great feats and do the impossible, it makes people charitable, invokes the wealthy to become philanthropists, invokes love, compassion, and righteousness. It makes us become better people, do greater things in life, and helps us succeed.

All credibility, all good conscience, all evidence of truth come only from the senses.
Friedrich Nietzsche

Development of Conscience:

Most people live with a self conceived idea and parameters of morality. It may be okay to lie a little but not to deceive or they may be comfortable to speak just to the advantages of doing something but choose to hide the negatives. But in general terms there is limit to who they choose to do and what they do not based on their moral values and comfort. These limits they choose change though time based on their individual experiences, social pressures and norms, or communal rituals and belief systems. But the conscience within eventually brings about a sense of balance as an individual evolves. But until such time the turmoil one can endure often affects their success and happiness in life.

When freedom does not have a purpose, when it does not wish to know anything about the rule of law engraved in the hearts of men and women, when it does not listen to the voice of conscience, it turns against humanity and society.
Pope John Paul II

So, how can one develop sound and balanced approach towards nurturing their conscience and morality to live a happy, content, and successful and guilt free life?

There are several theories based on studies of set groups. But it takes some honest self criticism and the will to self develop to come up with some key objectives:

1) One needs to see the need to self develop and the need to adhere to balanced and just moral values and conduct. This in turn helps develop their inner conscience on sound principles which will allow them to do what is right and make them feel bad when they go against it.

2) Fair judgement on balanced opinions and values. This can be practiced by not immediately reacting to any given situation. Exercising calm and some thinking can always help take a positive approach towards issues at hand. This becomes crucial to control haste and anger where patience and understanding would be more valuable.

3) Respect and Equality for one and all. This would avoid people holding prejudice and tame ones ego. People who do not practice this often continue to live a life of arrogance, and self indulgence at the cost of other people’s happiness, self respect and peace. But they also live a life of continuous fight against their inner guilt and general level of discontent about everything in life.

Through pride we are ever deceiving ourselves. But deep down below the surface of the average conscience a still, small voice says to us, something is out of tune.
Carl Jung

Life is too short to waste time over petty behaviours and toiling in guilt. Many of our ills and unhappiness are out of our own choices and actions in life which are often against out very one divine gift called conscience. By awakening and living in tune with our own conscience we can build better lives for ourselves, make more progress, co exist happily with one and other, live happier and become successful based on moral and clear thinking without the fear of guilt.

Labor to keep alive in your breast that little spark of celestial fire, called conscience.
George Washington


Advice is Cheap – Choose your advisers


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If it’s free, it’s advice; if you pay for it, it’s counselling; if you can use either one, it’s a miracle.
Jack Adams

Advice is cheap. It doesn’t cost anything but time and emotions for the person who gives advice. Which incidentally many have ample to dish away. Everyone can give advises too. I can give you advice about things which I have absolutely no idea about. Your friends can give you advice on love or relationships that they have personally never been in either of these situations.  An employee of any financial institution can advice you on global economies regardless of their institution being on the verge of a bail out themselves. Advice is cheap. Be good, be positive, be courageous so on and so forth. There are those who may advice you who themselves do not practice what they preach.  I have often learned a lot from such advisers more and followed their advises often. And as time passed by I realized that it is easier to give advice but there are several other factors that can stop you from practicing the same. Which also helped me realize the value of these advises about the right things to do in life and how difficult it is to walk the righteous path and hold on to your values.

 In giving advice seek to help, not to please, your friend.
Solon

Why do people give advice? It may not cost them anything monetarily. But the concern, love, concern and care they experience for you often holds lot more value to them than it does to you. Many advice because simply they care. These types of advisers are usually your family, friends or those who know you personally. Then there are those who offer their unsolicited advises whether they are concerned or not. They perhaps take more pride in their position where they can tell something of value and get some acknowledgement in return. And when you seek advice from some they either give you their opinion or advises based on their individual beliefs, experiences and feelings towards the subject. These advises can be biased or unbiased depending on their objective that moment.  Even subject matter experts are often wrong. Many advises from subject matter experts often change depending on the research programs and findings. One day wine will be very good for your heart the other day it wont. Likewise, you will be told to have 3 -4  cups of coffee by a Doctor on TV one week, and two later you will be asked to cut down to one. Meanwhile, you have only battered your heart for no good reason as a result of your actions based on such advises. 

 When you seek advice, do not withhold any facts from the person whose advice you seek.
Abu Bakr

 So how do you go about getting the right advice and seeking help when you need one? The fact is that the responsibility is upon you on who and what kind of advice you seek. If you want someone who simply needs to agree with you and your decisions you may seek anyone from your social circle who shares your similar ideas or values. They will often agree with your decisions and pamper your ego and actions regardless of whether they you are right or wrong.  But if you truly need a formidable person who can guide you with an unbiased opinion, then it has to be someone who knows you well and cares enough about you to tell you the facts and give the best advice they possibly can based on their individual knowledge and experience.  These are people who are from your immediate family and friends circle who know you over a period of time.

 

Parents can only give good advice or put them on the right paths, but the final forming of a person’s character lies in their own hands.
Anne Frank

 When you ahead out to seek some professional advice or guidance on a particular subject matter it is imperative that you place your trust and seek advice from those who truly are just, unbiased and are known to have provided good fact based advice to others. For example, seeking advice on a relationship from someone who themselves have had a failed relationships wouldn’t be wise. Similarly, seeking advice from a home owner on the right price for a home that you hope to purchase might not be the only advice you will need on that subject. If you truly seek to acquire a balanced and sound guidance on a subject you will have to go seek for it with some honest introspection, hard work and multiple sources before you are able to form an educated and well-balanced opinion. Such effort based, balanced and educated opinions often result in sound decisions and successful outcomes in life. I had mentioned honest introspection earlier because it is equally imperative and supremely important to remove your pride, prejudice, ego and preconceived notions about the subject from your mind on that particular subject in order to enable yourself to be open to what you learn from seeking such advises.

 

I never had a man come to me for advice yet, but what I soon discovered that he thought more of his own opinion than he did of mine. 

~Josh Billings

 Next time you find the need to seek advice or a valued opinion, take the time and put some thinking on choosing who you seek advice from. Value the advises that you receive from those who are concerned about you and love you. Be open to advises and learn that even people who may not have followed what they preach may teach you a valuable thing or two. Learning from other people’s mistakes saves from making your own. Be open to advises, do your research, explore your sources and options and learn well before you form your important decisions in life. Advice is cheap. But if it costs anyone it costs the person who bases his or her decision on that advice.  Your choice on the advice you follow and the sources and people who you seek advice from often has a great impact on major decisions in your life.  Advises can be from others, but the final decision and the outcome of following those advises are yours.

 Nobody can give you wiser advice than yourself.  ~Cicero


Economic Advices vs Commonsense?


Save, do not spend, but invest, in properties that are depreciating like cars, or invest in banks, insurance companies or energy companies or car manufacturers who will claim bankruptcy and have the Government bail them out using your tax dollars. Save! That’s the Mantra! Save and you shall become rich. Spend and you shall become poor. And it took a decline in the stock market, a plunge in the Dollar value and a chars in Europestock market to realize this. Further, it took the stupid channel on cable having an intelligent looking pretty face read of the teleprompter read out “..now we have an expert in Econocomic who is an author of : Another wise crack quoting flawed statistics to create fear for personal monetary benefits

 So what does these experts and so-called financial and economic Gurus say to the common man? Do not spend, save. Do not buy your fancy phones, cars, and luxuries of life that you so desire having worked your life off and pay a good chunk of it to the government. But do put the remaining pennies you bring home into a jar and “invest” it in companies that will either pay you minimal dividends over time or win your trust to invest more over a short period of time and finally declare bankruptcy once they have got all that they can make off you. Oh yes, do not worry, your tax dollars will bail them out should they fail and keep them afloat to ensure that they continue taking your money.

 Show me a man who became rich by saving and I will show you a few hundreds to one who became rich by earning more. Saving will help you not get poor, but earning more is the only way to become rich. Simple and common logic points to this basic fact. Ensure that your “needs” are fulfilled and put aside some if you have for a rainy day before you go get your “wants”.

The true fact is that the experts were wrong and continue to be wrong. Economy will not collapse, invest in real estate, build and they will come, people will buy anything that is cheap, invest in technology, invest in energy, and so on and so forth are all advice that never stuck. The experts who quoted them now sing a different song.

The common man pays. Pays for the governments blunders, pays as an investor, pays to take his own money out of a bank, pays his taxes, pays for his living, his needs, his wants, his familys’ needs and their wants and pays for his death. The people who find ways to take the common man’s money are those who make money. And amongst them who finds a way to take more money from the common man in exchange for something he needs, wants or places a higher value becomes rich. And those who do this frequently become richer. Trade: at its basic best.

We are forced to pay more of our hard earned money for many basic things that we shouldn’t. Health care, water, electricity, roadways and insurance are some that our tax dollars should cover. Yet we are forced and/or convinced to pay for such basic and rightful needs of ours  by age old philosophies, systems and concepts that are backed up by statistics that are produced by vested interests of the companies that service these industries. Spend! Not save! Yet the so called experts harp away the magic mantra of “Save”! Really genius? You have a platform today to dish out your cheap good for nothing advice because you are getting “paid” to say this and by creating some sort of fear and diversion from the reality where you make more money for fear mongering. When is the last time you saved? And if you did, what has it done to your wealth?

The facts remain to be facts. Not much that diverts from basic common sensibilities and logic.

  • Strive always to make more money. Earn more, innovate, think of ways to make more money by exchanging goods and services that others see value in.
  • Yes, do spend. But spend wisely. But your needs and your wants as and when you can afford it.
  • Save for a rainy day. Put some money aside just in case of emergency.
  • Enjoy life. Be happy and realize that many of these things can be sweeter with more money.
  • You live once, so do not live in constant fear and do not be foolish to pay high monetary value on momentary pleasures.
  • If you have excess, help others and the needy who cannot fend for themselves.
  • Invest only on secure ventures that ensure good returns. And you are willing to take chances, do not crib or cry when they fail you.
  • Make money and then spend it. Not the other way around.
  • Buying in credit with interest is nothing but fulfilling your wants by paying out of a possible income in your future for the product and paying more to the middle man in interest for allowing you to do so.
  • Remember that you can buy for $100 more today than what you can get for the same $100 a year later.
  • Learn to differentiate between depreciating assets and appreciating assets and put your money in the right kind.

Rather live a poor man with expensive experiences than be the richest man in the grave having lived a life of no pleasures.

Many experts have been very wrong. Many experts fail in their concepts. And ideas that seem to be true are dependent to that specific time, conditions, circumstances and period (which isn’t long). It never works if any of these parameters change. Ideas, concepts, theories and philosophies need to progressively evolve. Sadly they seldom do. New changing conditions do not adhere to age old paradigms. And economics is one constant proof of that. The economic super powers of yesterday are the rapidly dwindling debt holes of today. And those who were brandished as the poor nations and a country laden with street beggars are the economic stalwarts of today.

This comical madness of econophobia shall continue as long as we feed them with our money. First make yourself rich by earning more. Then perhaps invest with great caution and for decent returns gradually. Greed will get you. Greed will make the other man richer with your money. If you are greedy that is a great thing. It makes many people become rich and gives you a “chance” to become rich as well. But the “chance” is yours and only yours. For the gains for others are a sure fact.

Earn! Earn more!

Spend and rejoice of the money you earn.

Spend for good returns, or on things you place value in and not on those that give you nothing in return

Save just enough for your future (the future when you will not want to earn and live a retired life).

Save for emergency expenses.

Invest in yourself first! Invest in your happiness, life, and quality of life.

Invest in other ventures only on secure and substantial returns.

Gamble! A little risk is good. Simply because the returns are very good!

But do not blame a system or others for your greed!

Do not hate the successful and the wealthy, instead work towards becoming one of them or choose and work towards a comfortable economic state you are happy with.

Lastly, have some realistic expectations. You are not entitled for anything unless you work for it. NOTHING comes for free or easy. Ask your self what have you done or doing to get what you want.

Here are some select quotes:

If all the economists were laid end to end, they’d never reach a conclusion.  ~George Bernard Shaw

 

A happy life is one spent in learning, earning, and yearning.
Lillian Gish

 

Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people inAmerica.  If I’m not there, I go to work.  ~Robert Orben

 

Education is not solely about earning a great living. It means living a great life.
Brad Henry

 

Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair.  ~Sam Ewing

 

A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.  ~Bob Hope

 

Business is the art of extracting money from another man’s pocket without resorting to violence.  ~Max Amsterdam

 

When it is a question of money, everybody is of the same religion.  ~Voltaire

 

Money isn’t the most important thing in life, but it’s reasonably close to oxygen on the “gotta have it” scale.  ~Zig Ziglar

 

Economists are coming to acknowledge that measures of national wealth and poverty in terms strictly of average income tell you little that is significant of the health or viability of a society.
Rowan D. Williams

Economists report that a college education adds many thousands of dollars to a man’s lifetime income – which he then spends sending his son to college.
Bill Vaughan

Economic Disparity Complex:

However, we are collectively witnessing a growing sense of self entitlement by the have-nots and a general sense of anger at those who have. As opposed to taking charge and responsibility of their own state of economic conditions, and taking steps to earn more and develop towards becoming successful, many choose to blame those at the opposite end of the spectrum for their lack of initiative or the system. Strangely, those who are considered to be wealthy in USA the now notorious 1% consist of many who crossed the width of economic disparity by making choices and working hard towards building their wealth. They chose to innovate, invent, take risk, work harder, and take advantage of those who spent their hard-earned dollars in exchange for their offerings. For example: It is largely the middle class and to a great extent the lower earning members of the economic ladder who seem to spend their hard-earned dollars on fancy phones and gadgets that are developed and sold by those who become wealthy. The strange and ironic fact is that the remainder of this 99% choose to spend their time to use the same cell phones and online social media to organize protests against those who became wealthy by selling these very tools.

Once again, out comes the “experts” with the statistics and advice on the 1% of the evil “wealthy”. The wealthy own majority of the shares in big companies, they earn more than the 99%, they live in bigger houses etc. Yeah? What are they supposed to do with the wealth they earn? Not invest in business they choose? Dont buy things they like? What about the philanthropic contributions they make? If they have earned it they can choose to spend as they wish. Like wise, those who are at the lower end of the economic ladder have all they need and the freedom to make real choices and actions to become wealthy. They can “get rich or die trying” – right Curtis? If only these half-baked statistics from these so-called “experts” were unbiased and gave the point of view for both sides. Then the number will perhaps indicate towards what the 99% should and could do to cross the economic disparity.

Being wealthy isn’t a crime neither is being self-sufficient and happy where you stand. The “American Dream” isn’t just being a millionaire or wealthy. For many it is owning a house, raising good and balanced children, sharing good and happy memories, a cozy family dinner at Thanksgiving or owning a sports car close to their retirement. And for those who want to do all this and more, there is nothing stopping you from working harder, smarter, taking risks, being innovative, and making more money. The difference is in your attitude, approach, will and choices.

For every person who says they do not have enough money to put themselves through school, there are several who work two jobs and put themselves through school.

For every person who blames the tax system and the amount they pay in taxes, there are several who take advantage of the welfare provided and several more who pay the taxes and still achieve their dreams and ambitions.

For every person who spends time blaming the system and the “wealthy: there are several who work hard and find ways to become wealthy.

For every person who resorts to borrowing money or living on credit there are several who strive hard to earn that money and live within their means.

There is no use of fear mongering and marketing what I call “Econophobia” by the media and the silly statistics put forward by the experts. They are no reliable than the weathermans’ predictions. If the past statistics have proved anything, it is totally unreliable and will change faster than you expect it to change. Your success and economic condition lies in your will, ability and desires. There is no one that can be blamed for your failures but yourself. Stand up and make the changes you need to become successful! 


The power of YOU! Your true worth and purpose in life.


Many people have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose. ~ Helen Keller

We are people who constantly endeavor in a firm mission to make our life worth while and with purpose. Every living hour of interaction with other people, nature and life is merely a process of brining purpose to our action in which we seek some satisfaction of self. Thus it is very important for each of us to realize and question our purpose in almost every aspect of our life. What is the true purpose for our respective lives? What is the fundamental purpose to work? What is the purpose of marriage? Or most importantly, what purpose do we fulfill in another persons life?

Every one of us have been created uniquely with unique skills, capabilities, thought processes, and characters. But finding the unique purpose that we will full fill is something that we have to seek, develop and accomplish ourselves. No one is going to do it for us. In order for us to understand this we first need to realize the power of our individual influence.

The world of tomorrow, and the people who will live then, will live a life that has been shaped by the actions we take today. We know this too well because we ourselves life a life of the actions and steps taken by our ancestors. Similarly, we live our life today which is highly influenced by a hand full of individuals who made great contributions, inventions and discoveries. The moment we realize this simple fact and make a choice to exercise our existence to make a good influence to humanity we find purpose.

Only a life lived for others is the life worthwhile. ~ Albert Einstein

We unknowingly often fulfill many purposed in other people’s lives. For example: we fulfill the purpose of being an adviser when one seeks this from us, we fulfill the purpose of being a friend when people need us, we fulfill the purpose of being an mentor to those who look up to us for guidance. We also influence the world around us by our choices, purpose and reactions. Hence we must make good of our purpose and ensure that it aimed towards a noble cause.

How we think, process any given information, make our choices and react is unique to us. And this shapes our world around us. We influence people and many other greater things in life by these unique and individual reactions and choices. This individual identity of ours fulfills a unique purpose in life. We matter. Our actions matter. And hence it is important to improve our actions and reactions constantly to make a better and good impact on our life and world.

There comes a special moment in everyone’s life, a moment for which that person was born. That special opportunity, when he seizes it, will fulfill his mission – a mission for which he is uniquely qualified. In that moment, he finds greatness. It is his finest hour. ~ Sir Winston Churchill

You can make a unique difference.

You matter!

Remember that your actions and purpose has greater significance in many other people’s lives!

Your contributions to mankind, world, family, and evryone you touched in your life are the only things that show your true worth and character. These are the only things that make your life worthwhile and it begins with you!

 Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary. ~ Steve Jobs


Personality Progressive Development


 

 

Yes, personality has external and other factors that determine it. Heredity, our respective external environment, personal experiences and specific circumstances have a bearing on our respective individual personalities. However, other than heredity, we as humans can exercise your power to choose and think to make the changes we need to our personalities as opposed to blaming other factors. As we grow older, gain maturity, develop our own beliefs, opinions, ability to think, ability to differentiate between good and bad, ability to choose and disregard, we can make the much-needed developments to make ourselves better human beings in the process. As we all know that personality always changes over time and based on individual experiences, we can surely choose to make these experiences and time to shape ourselves as better individuals. It is easy to blame our faults and lack of ability to progressively evolve into better human beings, but it is imperative for us to take ownership of our own good and change our personalities for the better.  

Here are some ideas to help build a positive personality. Following these can and will help you become more popular, likeable, loveable, and impact your life very positively:

Identify yourself first: Be reasonably self-analytical and critical. Compare yourself to an ideal personality you seek to become and ask yourself why that personality. Identify areas you need to develop or improve. Try to understand who you really are, where do you come from, and what are the good and bad morals and values of who you truly are.

Recognize the need for improvement and progress: Realize your pitfalls and mistakes. List areas of improvement and development needed. See where you what to be, how do you want to be, how do you want people to see you as. And in doing so, ensure you are being realistic and are aiming for honest, moral and positive attributes.

Learn willingly and openly: Learn from others, pick their goodness and good wisdom, and reject their bad habits and beliefs. Search for good sources to learn from all and every experience from your life. Don’t reject anyone or any things you can learn from. Wise wisdom can be found in any place from anyone, so can immoral aspects. Choose the good and keep learning.

Take charge and responsibility: Know that you have the capability and courage to become who you want. Be determined and take charge of your own development. Not doing anything will not get you anywhere. So, become responsible and a confident individual.

Be genuine and honest: Be honest in your efforts. Be honest to self and be honest with others. Your honesty is clearly visible. Do not take others for fools and assume they can’t see your dishonesty. If people do not react it doesn’t mean they believe you. Your honest is very clearly visible in your actions, deeds, and words.

Be considerate and polite: Develop basic skills to behave, talk, act and think in a considerate and polite manner. By respectful of others before you expect them to show these attributes to you.

Follow through your commitments: When you give your word or commit to something, be bold, courageous and honorable enough to follow through with your actions. Weather it is in a relationship or work, one has to learn the value of integrity and consequences of misleading someone and having them pin their hopes, desires, wishes and emotions to their commitment. A person, who doesn’t stand by their word and follow through in actions, will never be able to find true happiness or respect within or from others. 

Be selective and aware of your choice of words: Use positive words always. Speak softly, yet clearly and firmly. Think of sentences and words before you speak to avoid misunderstandings. Use kind and eloquent words when and where possible. Control your voice when you speak. Be aware and respectful of your surroundings. Think how you are coming across to your audience.

Be sensible with criticism: Do not criticize. You may casually be critical amongst your close friends and family, but be aware there is a limit there too. If people laugh along with you it doesn’t mean they approve of your criticism. And remember that there is only a fine line between criticism, condemnation and character assassination.

Be a good listener: One of the key factors is to be a good listener. Learn to be patient, show genuine interest, look them in the eye, and truly listen to what they are saying to you. Ask questions, don’t interrupt, and be considerate.

Motivate and Inspire: Speak words and act in a manner that inspires others and motivates others to become positive and be happier. I call this putting butterflies in their stomachs. Say things to help others that make sense and makes then smile and ticklish in their stomach. Positive words with a smile, smell good, dress good, walk tall, etc.

Recognize Good and appreciate it: If you recognize and appreciate a good behavior in a person, it makes the other person repeat this particular behavior more. When you see good, walk up to this person and express your appreciation. You there by build their confidence and boost their positive behavior.

Be generous and helpful and expect nothing in return: Help others generously. Help by sharing knowledge, teach, share wealth with the poor, share your wisdom, your experiences, share your goodness. And do it with humility by understanding you too take and need others help in life. And do it freely as a good human being and expect nothing in return.

Be humble and grateful: Thank people, give away your ego in exchange for gratefulness. Be nice, and do not show off. Let yourself be known by your character and class. Not as a shameless and cheap loud mouth.

Be honorable and loyal: Keep your, morals, values, principles and honor intact. People will learn to depend on you based on these virtues.

Carry a great sense of humor: This one attribute will help you sail through any problems, complexities, stress and relationships. Take a lighter look at situations and learn to see the funnier side of things. Laugh at them and share the laughter. Learn to laugh at yourself.

Don’t procrastinate: Daily make it a habit to list things, then prioritize them and aim to complete the top three at least in a given day always. This will eventually give you a tremendous sense of accomplishment and impact your attitude positively.

Take care of your appearance: Don’t become careless and disregard your appearance. Always aim to look good, maintain good hygiene, appear to be clean, smell good, dress well, etc. Take care of your health, weight, and appearance.

Earn Respect: Don’t expect people to respect your title, age or gender. Earn their respect by behaving in a manner that contributes to your title, age gender etc. Earn the right to give advice, comment, or speak. Give respect before you expect it from others. And command respect by your behavior, do not shamelessly demand it when you do not get any.

Become a better Human being as well. Or more importantly be a human being that makes others what to be like you. Be able to respect yourself and see how you come across as a person and an individual to the world around you. Here are a few perspective I like to share to become a good human being first:

  • Love everyone regardless of caste, religion, creed, color, country or culture but for the good in them. The will love you back for the same reasons.
  • Strive to become a moral and responsible individual.
  • Respect all as well and above all do not be critical of the differences. They will reciprocate in the same manner towards you.
  • Be honest to self first. You will be rewarded and others will respect you for that.
  • Build character by actions and deeds, and not by words. You will inspire others and your loved ones by this.
  • You will find common ground with every person you meet if you want to. But you should be willing to communicate and be approachable.
  • Establish your identity by character. Not by your skin color, culture or religion. You will win the love, respect and appreciation of all people you meet all through your life.
  • Take pride in who you are and what you are made of. If you don’t respect yourself, your culture or religion, others will not respect these either.
  • Don’t build a pseudo personality in order to pretend to be affiliated to a popular group or a person to win their love and respect. Real people can see through it. And you eventually will find yourself to be lonely as your pretentious guard will one day fall.
  • Learn and be self-critical! Do not be so pig-headed that you never improve yourself and deteriorate over time in knowledge and wisdom.
  • Lastly, please take time to appreciate what you like in others. It’s a simple phenomenon. The more you appreciate what you liked in one person, the more that person feels like giving it to you and others.

 


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